Luca’s Thoughts on Landscaping

We signed a contract with Mr. Landscape Man tonight, and I’m excited. But my excitement is a little subdued because the evening was fairly traumatic.
The very first time Mr. Landscape Man came over, he seemed a little nervous about Millie. He said he’d been bitten by a customer’s dog before. We assured him she does not bite.
Tonight, he seemed at ease, playing with the dog freely. We all sat down at the dining room table to go over final prices when Luca jumped into the seat next to him and shoved her fat gray head in front of him. He was kind, and began petting her.
That always makes me nervous. I know she bites. I explain to visitors that she bites. They always say, “Oh don’t worry, I know cats.” Luca climbed into his lap and I told him he could shoo her away. He declined.
Then abruptly, she launched her attack. He pushed her off his lap into the chair, but her assault wasn’t finished. She bit his arm again before she jumped down. At first he acted like it was no big deal, but I could see a few spots of blood.
A moment later I looked again, and a river of blood was pouring down his arm and elbow. I jumped up for a paper towel. He constantly wiped at the wound, but it just kept bleeding. Horrified, I watched him place one bloody paper towel on my placemat (where I eat every night), then take the other one to wipe the blood off the floor.
I really don’t know if she got him that badly, maybe he’s just one of those people who bleeds profusely and doesn’t clot well. But the bleeding continued and continued. I began to wonder if he needed stitches.
Finally when it was time for him to leave, he extended the bloody towels to Lee, who kindly showed him the trash can. I thought I was going to throw up. Lee mentioned calling in a hazmat crew. Might be a good idea. I know something drastic will have to be done to our table and placemat before I can even think about eating there again.

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